Breathe In. Breath Out.
She didn’t cry. She didn’t raise her voice.
She just said, flatly:
“I can’t take it anymore.”
A professional mom in a divorce support group, trying to stay composed while describing what it’s like to share a home with the man she’s leaving. Her lawyer has advised her not to move out. She’s in limbo—provoked daily, exhausted, angry, and stuck.
She looked around the circle.
“I’m so angry all the time. How do I get through this? What can I do?”
The divorce coach answered simply:
“Control what you can in a world that is out of control.”
When life circumstances feel like too much to handle and are out of our control, but we can’t walk away, we always have control of at least one thing.
We can breathe.
Breath as a Bridge Between Mind and Body
Our breath is the meeting place of the conscious and subconscious.
We breathe whether or not we think about it.
But when we do think about it—when we bring attention to the breath—we can shift our nervous system, our mood, and our energy. We can move from reaction to regulation.
Breath is a powerful tool to shift ourselves from fight, flight, or freeze sympathetic response, to the tend and befriend, rest and digest slow deep breath of the parasympathetic response.
Breathing Techniques for Anger, Overwhelm, and Stress
Slow, deep breathing calms the nervous system and releases tension. Even just a few intentional breaths can help quiet the stress response and bring the body into a more balanced state.
Try these simple practices anytime:
1. 🌀 4-4 Breathing to Stay Regulated Throughout the Day
Keep your system balanced before anger spikes.
Inhale for a count of 4
Exhale for a count of 4
This rhythm helps stabilize the autonomic nervous system, creating space between trigger and response.
2. 🌙 4-8 Breathing to Wind Down Before Bed
To ease into rest—or let go of tension—try:
Inhale for 4 counts
Exhale for 8 counts
Lengthening the exhale helps shift the body into parasympathetic mode—“rest and digest,” or as some say, “tend and befriend.”
Movement and Muscle Release as Daily Tools
Breath is just one part of the equation. The body holds stress, too. To release the slings and arrows of daily aggressions, to put the body at a calmer baseline, with the ability to tolerate more stress before feeling overwhelmed, I recommend these two practices:
✔️ Progressive Muscle Relaxation:
Tense and release one muscle group at a time, either on waking or before sleep. This technique helps lower baseline stress and makes you less reactive to daily triggers.
✔️ Movement:
Whether it's a walk to the lake, a run, yoga, or weightlifting—movement clears stuck emotions and prevents them from embedding deeper. Emotions that aren’t processed can take root in the body. Movement helps them flow through.
When You Feel Like You Can’t Cope—You Still Can
There are moments when life feels impossible. When you’re stuck, worn down, and overwhelmed.
But tools like breathwork, nervous system regulation, and somatic movement make the impossible more possible.
They don’t erase the circumstances—but they help you manage them. They grow your inner capacity. They hold you steady until the external shifts.
When you can’t leave the situation, you can still come home to yourself.
🌀 Join Dr. Kohar Jones on May 8th for a special pop-up class: Breathing for Optimum Health.
You’ll explore how breath connects to your nervous system, how emotions shape your breathing patterns, and how small shifts can regulate your energy and mood.
Reserve your spot →https://bit.ly/breathdeep25